Bullet to My Heart
by SilentBlade01
Summary: Usagi and the rest of the senshi have to deal with Rei's tragic actions - in ways that no one could ever expect.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: ** The _Sailor Moon _series and surrounding enterprises are the sole property of Ms. Naoko Takeuchi. I claim no ownership to the saga or its characters and am writing this story for the sole purpose of entertainment.

Hey everyone, this is a work that recent events have inspired me to write. I'm not sure if I'll continue it or not. If anyone would like to see me do so, drop me a line in the reviews section. No flames please, but constructive criticism is welcome.

This first chapter is actually a series of flashback Usagi's having while indulging from her parent's wine cabinet…just wanted to clear up any possible confusion.

_**Bullet to my Heart**_

"Gomen nasai, Usagi-chan…" Rei whispered… "Gomen nasai.' "Rei! No!" I screamed before the gunshot left my ears ringing.

***thump***

"Tsukino-san?" Dr. Yamamoto inquired. "Yes?" I replied. "Hino-san is one very lucky young woman. Luckily the bullet missed all major internal organs. She will, however, have to spend some time in the psychiatric care unit once she heals from her incision." "I understand sir," was the only response I could give at the moment. "If you'd like, you may see her before she's transferred." I could only nod and walk into the ICU room that held the one person I considered my twin sis – though the other scouts never would know that by the way we constantly bickered. Truly, they were all my sisters, but there had always been something between Rei and I that let us harangue each other without worry.

***thump***

She was so frail…there was no color in her cheeks, and she gave only a small moan as I brushed her bangs away from her face. I hesitated a moment as I felt my heart scream in agony at her condition. "Doushite, Rei-chan? Doushite…" I whispered. Seconds turned into minutes, and soon the ever-vigilant head nurse was escorting me out of the room. Before I went, I placed a small, sisterly kiss upon her brow, murmuring "Aishiteru, my twin, as I left."

As I passed into the waiting room, the rest of my motley band of sisters and guardians joined me. Mamo-chan had gone back to America after Galaxia's departure, and I really didn't have the heart or the stomach to tell him what had happened at the moment. "Usagi-chan?" the rest of the scouts inquired. I simply shook my head.

***thump***

"I'm sorry Usagi-chan, but Rei-chan has made it clear she wants nothing to do with you," Mina-chan said with sadness. "You have to let her decide the terms of your friendship."

"But what have I done?" I cried as my heart proceeded to metaphorically bleed out in my chest. Ever since that one, brief visit I had managed with Rei, I hadn't been allowed to see her again. However, no one seemed to want to tell me anything.

***thump***

"THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT YOU STUPID BLONDE!" Rei's grandfather, usually nice – though perverted – shouted. I clutched my cheek at the stinging sensation left behind by his slap. In the face of my everlasting hope that had saved us all in times past, I had made my way to the temple to try to see if I could find out the status of Rei's condition. She had been transferred earlier that week to the psychiatric hospital, but no one could figure out where or how she was doing. What a fool I had been… I could only cry as I wondered why it seemed that everyone was abandoning me. Why hadn't Mamo-chan returned my calls?

***thump***

"I know how you feel, hime, but everything has its own time," Setsuna told me. "But she won't talk to me to even tell me why she's blaming me!" I exclaimed. "MY HEART IS BREAKING INTO A MILLION PIECES AND NOONE WILL TELL ME A DAMN THING!" Setsuna could only stare silently as her eyes swam with regret.

***thump***

"I'm so sorry this is happening," my lover held me close. This was the most comfort I had had, but my head was still spinning from the last few days. "Usako…I have no idea why, but she's told everyone you were one of the reasons why. That she hates you. I really….I really didn't want to be the one to tell you, but everyone agreed you might take it better coming from me," Mamoru whispered – his voice cracking. I gasped, "Nani? Iie! Iie!" I pushed my fiancé sharply away and ran from his apartment. He had flown in for the holidays when he had heard about Rei. Telling him was one of the hardest things I had made myself go through. Re-living all of it was so incredibly painful. "Usako, wait!"

I raced on foot through the cold rain all the way home. It had been relatively mild this winter, with no snow in sight. I was thankful, and didn't care as the rain burned icy holes into my skin as I ran. Once to my front porch, I collapsed and emptied my stomach of its contents until blood ran down the pavement from the strain. The last thing I remember is my mother coming to the door and screaming – then the strong, warm arms of my papa carrying me to my room. The next few days were a blur of bed rest and medical procedures. I really didn't give a damn about any of it.

***thump***

These memories hurt so much…why can't I forget…I only want…to forget…. I swirled my sangria in a wine glass I had ninja'd from my parent's cabinet as they were on vacation in the country. My head became cloudy from the alcohol – I had always been a light weight - , but that was ok, better this sensation than the rest.

I heard the most sadistic laughter. Who? I wondered, could be making such a chilling sound. It was then I noticed my full length mirror. In it was the neoqueen, or a mockery of her…she was still breathtakingly beautiful, but with an ebony gown instead of her usual brilliant white. "Does it hurt Serenity?" she murmured, "Take my hand, and I can make it go away." "Promise?" I whispered. "Just take my hand, and you'll see…"


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: ** The _Sailor Moon _series and surrounding enterprises are the sole property of Ms. Naoko Takeuchi. I claim no ownership to the saga or its characters and am writing this story for the sole purpose of entertainment.

_** Bullet to My Heart – Chapter 2.**_

And so I found myself floating in a sea of currents that were pleasantly warm. 'Who would ever want to wake up from a place as nice as this?' was the thought that ran across my mind. There's nothing but pain in the outside world…

"Serenity…" a sweet voice called. My eyes began to open as Rei-chan's face flashed across my vision, and I recoiled as if struck. In response, I hugged my arms tightly against my body and shut my eyes even tighter than before – willing the memories away.

"Serenity, this is the first step…" the voice said, "You must open your eyes if you're to ever conquer the pain." I hesitated for a moment, then slowly let my eyes open for a moment to gaze upon the same dark version of my future self as before.

"Who are you, and why are you here?" I demanded. Dark Serenity – as I'd come to call her in my mind – paused for a moment in deep thought. "I suppose, child, you could think of me as a missing puzzle piece – a part of yourself that you'd locked away," was her cryptic response. "Eh?" was my dumbfounded reply, "Care to elaborate?"

"The moon is both light and dark, two sides of the same coin. And before you mistake me for Nehelenia, I will tell you right now that the ignorant wretch was nothing like me. Just because I control the dark does not make me evil anymore than the night sky is evil for providing ones with the diamonds of stars. You have been misinformed, and by relying on one side of your power, you have left yourself crippled…I am the manifestation of that other side of the coin – one, who if you allow it, will train you and prepare you for what is to come" Dark Serenity explained. "You may call me Lady Eclipse."

"What about Rei-chan?" I questioned…"I thought you said you'd take away the pain?"

"I can, child," she replied, "That will come as you learn to control your power – and as a result, your emotions. Your senshi abandoned her duty and will have much to answer for. If you do not learn to control your emotions, your power – once complete – will destroy you. The best I can do for you is to fade the memories of that day and its consequences – making them as if they were merely a distant nightmare. However, you will still have to bear them…for only by going through the pain can you overcome it. I won't lie to you Serenity; I will have to intensify those emotions at times as part of your training."

My face fell slightly, but I nodded. My eyebrows scrunched together as I fell into deep thought. 'If I can escape this hell, if only in some small way, then it's worth it.'

"I accept your offer, Lady Eclipse," I said with a voice as strong as possible.

She smiled, a beautiful image for a being composed of so much darkness, and cupped her hands in front of her. A vial full of metallic purple liquid formed in her hands, and once solidified, she handed me the glass bottle, and waited expectantly. Seeing my confusion, she said, "This is for your memories. In order to fade them as I spoke of, you must drink every last drop… It's not the best tasting potion, so I recommend you take it like a shot."

I took a deep breath, uncapped the bottle, and touched the opening to my lips, thinking 'here goes nothing,' and chugged it while tilting my head back. I gasped and dropped the bottle upon finishing – not noticing the sound of shattering glass as incredible pain shot down my spine. The taste did leave much to be desired…a combination of cheap wine and old beer, with an aftertaste of cough syrup. The room spun as the burning intensified, and I soon passed out.

Back on Earth, the remaining members of the senshi and Mamoru had gathered in his apartment, as no one had the heart to hold meetings in the temple without Rei present.

"I still don't understand how you could have let her run off like that," Minako growled, her arms crossed and usually bubbly exterior essentially nonexistent.

"I didn't have any warning whatsoever!" Mamoru responded, "I never thought she would run off like that!"

"What the hell were you thinking?" Makoto said, "It should have been a give that she wasn't going to take it well…who would take news like that well? You should have anticipated it!"

"I'd like to see you do better, you pompous, arrogant exc-" Mamoru was cut off. "GUYS! SHUT UP! FIGHTING LIKE THIS ISN'T GOING TO BRING USAGI OR REI BACK!" Ami yelled.

Everyone turned, shocked, to look at the normally quiet bluenette.

"Sorry Ami…" everyone murmured like kids that had been scolded.

"It's all right, now, let's get down to business. Have the Tsukinos heard anything from Usagi since she disappeared?" Ami questioned.

"No, after they called we had to come up with a story, so we said that she had gone on a school trip for a few weeks. Mrs. Tsukino seemed upset she hadn't been told beforehand, but when I told her it was a reward for Usagi's hard work, she was thrilled," Makoto responded.

"Oh…" Ami blinked, "Well then. I've run some scans on the moon and different planets within the solar system, and while there have been some minor energy fluctuations, I haven't been able to turn up anything significant." Everyone sighed. Minako thought for a moment, "Hey Ames, is it possible she could be in a different dimension, like on those science fiction movies?"

Ami sweatdropped, "Uh…well…that actually is a possibility. I'll look into doing a few calculations that would allow me to try to lock onto any dimensional residue from interspace travel."

"Setsuna might have a few ideas as well; maybe someone could try contacting her?" Mamoru suggested. "I'll see what I can do, Minako said, "But for now, I think we should consider this meeting adjourned."

Everyone nodded, "Agreed."


End file.
